The Answer is not in the Protest

We are polarized people when it comes to finding a solution for school shooting and mass murders. There are some, like me, who vacillate between the camps. I completely agree there is no good reason for assault-style weapons to be available for purchase. And, I completely agree that if guns are illegal, violent criminals will be the only ones who have them. So, does that make me a less-than-intelligent individual who can’t make up her mind? No, I think it’s like the old adage says, “Wherever conflict exists, truth lies somewhere in the middle.”

The truth, as I see it anyway, is school shootings  have less to do with guns and more to do with the people pulling the triggers. Before my pro-gun friends and family get all excited thinking I’m completely in their camp, I have to say a trigger pulled once on an assault rifle can decimate many lives. There’s no reason for someone to have that ability.

The interview held in a Marion County, Florida jailtells us a lot about the truth. A young man’s loneliness, desperation and lost ability for hope led to him taking a shotgun into his former high school in my community. He’s a handsome young man. He spoke with manners. He didn’t seem to hate people in his school. He didn’t seem to be searching for glory. He is a living, breathing testimony to the fact that both sides of the gun control argument are right. He was able to purchase a gun illegally with no background check–that’s a check for the pro-gun camp. The gun he bought was not an assault weapon. Fortunately, the one shot he took did not take a life–or many lives if it had been an assault rifle–that’s a check for the gun control camp. 

The words the young man shared cut to the core of the issue and it has nothing to do with guns. “My first memory is violence and conflict.” He shared, while he had never been physically abused, he grew up in a home with mental illness. He spent most of his days alone. The loneliness led to depression. He entered Forest High School yesterday morning looking for a way out–he was looking for help. 

While our society as a whole–not just my community– stands encamped on polar opposite sides of gun control, there is a great void. That void is where evil can flourish as families are destroyed by substance abuse, mental illness and hopelessness. The evil that incites rage is conceived in poverty and cradled in mental illness. The evil that empowers murder is nourished in hateful banter from political leaders who view problems in society with tunnel vision. The evil that arms the shooters with weapons is strengthened by advocating rights for all over the lack of responsibility for some. The evil that emboldens the lack of respect for life is encouraged by advocating removal of rights for all because of the abuse of those rights by some. The evil that steals hope from the lives of our young people is fueled by childhood bullies who seek their own status by isolating and ridiculing instead of connection and kindness.

I don’t believe in coincidence. A few hours after the Forest High School shooter was apprehended, I was in the regularly scheduled professional development luncheon for the Florida Public Relations Association. Our guest speaker was Jessica McCune, one of my most favorite people on the planet. Jessica’s career has focused on helping others. As a nurse, she provided care for people who were physically ill. She later developed the local Parrish Nurses program to train and empower nurses to volunteer in the community and in their faith-based congregations to connect physical and spiritual health. She is now working with Hospice of Marion County to encourage emotional healing through grief. Her topic was her passion for storytelling. The professional development for communicators was to learn how to deliver messages that connect with the audiences we seek to reach. Jessica shared a long list of books to support her mantra that we as humans are all alike at the core. She quoted a New York Times writer Andrew Solomon, “It’s nearly impossible to hate someone once you know their story.” Although, I’ve heard the concept attributed to Mister Rogers as, “Frankly, there isn't anyone you couldn't learn to love once you've heard their story.” The bottom line is, we need to connect to one another. We need to reach out to the lonely. 

As a woman of faith, I believe our answer is Jesus. But I also know if His followers, including me, truly embodied His teachings, there would be less opportunity for evil to flourish in the void between the polarized camps in our society. When we choose camps over Christ, the marginalized and vulnerable become targets for evil to connect them to violence and rage. People who need the Light of hope will be sparked by the evil of desperation as we argue on our platforms.

My friend Amy Mangan wrote a column for our local newspaper that ran earlier in the week. She recounted the impact of music in our lives and the joy of the first album she owned. I remember as a child playing Jackie DeShannon’s album on our family’s console stereo record player, “What the world needs now, is love, sweet love. It’s the only thing that there’s much too little of.” That is more true today than it was in 1965 when Hal David penned those lyricsand in the 70’s when the needle of our record-player connected DeShannon’s voiceto my house on a hill in Eva, AL. 

The answer is as complex as it is simple. Forget the lofty goal of love for everyone now. Let’s just conquer kindness. Teach our children to gain self-esteem through their kindness toward others. Since those childhood bullies grow up to be adults, we need to discipline ourselves to remain civil in discourse when we disagree. Pause when anger or the desire to belittle others fills our hearts. We need to learn to choose kindness over chaos. Children are watching how we conduct ourselves. Let’s move from polarized camps to fill the void where evil thrives and invest in others’ lives–connect with kindness and little by little, let’s fill the void!